violetblue's Xanga

Friday, July 16, 2004

Fri, 16 Jul 2004 02:27:21 GMT

A very meaningful story indeed. I wish you all the best and happiness.

------------------------------------------------------------------------Ivan

Thursday, July 15, 2004

Thu, 15 Jul 2004 03:22:01 GMT

Grow Old With Me

I have a friend who is falling in love. She honestly claims the sky is bluer. Mozart moves her to tears. She has lost 15 pounds and looks like a cover girl. "I am young again!" she shouts exuberantly.

As my friend raves on about her new love, I've taken a good look at my old one. My husband of almost 20 years, Scott, has gained 15 pounds. Once a marathon runner, he now runs only down hospital halls. His hairline is receding and his body shows signs of long working hours and too many candy bars. Yet he can still give me a certain look across a restaurant table and I want to ask for the check and head home. When my friend asked me "What will make this love last?" I ran through all the obvious reasons: commitment shared interests, unselfishness, physical attraction, and communication. Yet there's more. We still have fun. Spontaneous good times. Yesterday, after slipping the rubber off the rolled newspaper, Scott flipped it playfully at me: this led to an all-out war. Last Saturday at the grocery, we split the list and raced each other to see who could make it to the checkout first. Even washing dishes can be a blast. We enjoy simply being together.

And there are surprises.

One time I came home to find a note on the front door that led me to another note, then another, until I reached the walk-in closet. I opened the door to find Scott holding a "pot of gold" (my cooking kettle) and the "treasure" of a gift package. Sometimes I leave him notes on the mirror and little presents under his pillow.

There is understanding.

I understand why he must play basketball with the guys. And he understands why, once a year, I must get away from the house, the kids - and even him - to meet my sisters for a few days of nonstop talking and laughing.

There is sharing.

Not only do we share household worries and parental burdens - we also share ideas. Scott came home from a convention last month and presented me with a thick historical novel. Though he prefers thrillers and science fiction, he had read the novel on the plane. He touched my heart when he explained it was because he wanted to be able to exchange ideas about the book after I'd read it.

There is forgiveness.

When I'm embarrassingly loud and crazy at parties, Scott forgives me. When he confessed losing some of our savings in the stock market, I gave him a hug and said, "It's okay. It's only money."

There is sensitivity.

Last week he walked through the door with that look that tells me it's been a tough day. After he spent some time with the kids, I asked him what happened. He told me about a 60-year old woman that had a stroke. He wept as he recalled the woman's husband standing beside her bed, caressing her hand. How was he going to tell this husband of 40 years that his wife would probably never recover? I shed a few tears myself. Because of the medical crisis. Because there were still people who have been married 40 years. Because my husband is still moved and concerned after years of hospital rooms and dying patients.

There is faith.

Last Tuesday a friend came over and confessed her fear that her husband is losing his courageous battle with cancer. On Wednesday I went to lunch with a friend who is struggling to reshape her life after divorce. On Thursday a neighbor called to talk about the frightening effects of Alzheimer's disease on her father-in-law's personality. On Friday a childhood friend called long-distance to tell me her father had died. I hung up the phone and thought, This is too much heartache for one week. Through my tears, as I went out to run some errands, I noticed the boisterous orange blossoms of the gladiolus outside my window. I heard the delighted laughter of my son and his friend as they played. I caught sight of a wedding party emerging from a neighbor's house. The bride, dressed in satin and lace, tossed her bouquet to her cheering friends. That night, I told my husband about these events. We helped each other acknowledge the cycles of life and that the joys counter the sorrows. It was enough to keep us going.

Finally, there is knowing.

I know Scott will throw his laundry just shy of the hamper every night; he'll be late to most appointments and eat the last chocolate in the box. He knows that I sleep with a pillow over my head; I'll lock us.

I guess our love lasts because it is comfortable. No, the sky is not bluer: it's just a familiar hue. We don't feel particularly young: we've experienced too much that has contributed to our growth and wisdom, taking its toll on our bodies, and created our memories. I hope we've got what it takes to make our love last. As a bride, I had Scott's wedding engraved with Robert Browning's line "Grow old along with me!"

We're following those instructions. "If anything is real, the heart will make it plain." There are some people who meet that somebody that they can never stop loving, no matter how hard they try. I wouldn't expect you to understand that, or even believe it, but trust me, there are some love that don't go away. And maybe that makes them crazy, but we should all be blest to end up with that somebody who has a little of that insanity. Somebody who never lets go. Somebody who cherishes you forever. Hope you find this kind of love in your life.

Grow old along with me!
The best is yet to be,
the last of life for which the first was made.
- Robert Browning

Tuesday, July 13, 2004

Tue, 13 Jul 2004 16:22:59 GMT

Hi everyone.... Another month had pass.... today is our 5th month anniversary. I sms her but no reply. So I called her... but she didn't answer... ... well I guess she is asleep by now. Anyway I want wish my Mao Mao... Happy 5th Months Anniversary... And I LOVE U...

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------Ivan

Tuesday, July 06, 2004

Tue, 06 Jul 2004 17:52:51 GMT

Hi everyone... I hope everything had been going fine with you guys and gals.

Well tonite is the 1st nite (beside any of our oversea trip) to sleep alone since my Mao Mao moved in to stay with me for almost 3 months. I miss the feeling of her being at my side and cuddle her to sleep.

I wonder does she miss my loud snore... kekeke...... I hope she is ok back home.

Thats all for now... wish all of you best of health.... Takecare...

-----------------------------------------------------------Ivan

Tuesday, June 29, 2004

Tue, 29 Jun 2004 05:27:40 GMT

lalala~ woo~ i'm back from my bangkok trip... heh heh.
miss my zhu mao darling sooooo much... althought it was only 4 days.. heh heh.

it was so nice of him to change his shift with calvin so that he can go wait for me at the airtport.. heh heh... lalala~ love u lots and lots... ^^

last night i think i was a little reasonable sia.. hur hur. asked him to iron my clothes for me when i knew he was tired. lalala~ *guity*..hur hur...

i did a new layout on my princess_alexandros blog~ now it's all lush green..woo~ wo xi huan ;)

but this violet blue one...hmm.... i dun see the need to bah. i think i still like this simple cute and nice layout ^^

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someone shared this with me.. and i wanna share it with the ppl here..

Love is like 2 ppl filling up a piece of paper...

A relationship starts off as a clear piece of paper. A guy and a gal agree to write on that piece of paper. When it starts, both are excited, as it?s their time working together.

They fill up the paper with the best of things they can think of.
Sometimes the guy writes more, sometimes the gal writes more.
Some people write without thinking much, some writes after some thought.

As the writing carries on, it gets more & more tiring. The couples have to be motivated to keep on writing. This is the commitment and responsibility of a relationship. As long as the urge to write continues, the writing will never end. It will carry on paper after paper until pen?s ink run out. This is the eternal love till deaths do us apart?

Some couples prefer to write together, some write their own & combine the efforts. Neither side should be the one only one writing; else ink may get blocked for the party who writes non-stop. Too tired?

The character of the person is like the handwriting on the paper?
Everyone has his or her handwriting. It is very difficult to change one?s handwriting. Not impossible but it takes a lot of time and hard work.

The outcome may not be desirable. It is also difficult to imitate the handwritings of another person. The most one can do is to be tidier or many untidy in their handwritings. Sometimes, to make the writing on the paper look more presentable, it could be necessary for either side to slightly alter the style of his/her handwritings?

A mistake in love is like a smudge on the paper? Whether purposely or accidently a smudge is a smudge. No matter how well the writing has gone. So far or how lovely is the content, a smudge will leave a mark no matter how well you cover it (eraser, liquid paper, etc..). Whether to keep on writing will depend on the perception of the couple. Whether they mind the content more or the outlook of the piece of work more.

Worst case is when the paper is torn. It?ll leave a very ugly mark. Well, the decision lies with the couple?

To break-off is to stop writing? Many reasons can lead to this ending. One party could be the one writing non-stop and really too tired to carry on anymore. One party or both could be unsatisfied with the content or really dislike what each other is writing (it takes time to know the writing style of someone, it could be halfway through the paper before it is known). Or a smudge exists and either one or both mind (depend on their level of perfectionism). Or it could be what they are writing and what they are contradiciting each other. It can also be the case where one party finds another partner to write with?

Other analogies? Pen users are serious lovers. Those who use pencil like to test things out first. Some even write drafts with other people (many timers). After a breakup, a photocopy of writings so far is made and this is given to a party while the other keeps the original (for memories). Or it could be either or neither will keep the writings. It could also be the original work lies there waiting for the original writers to be back.

A well-doned masterpiece could be bound into a book and kept forever. Likewise in some cases, it may be pieces of paper lying around. Different people write different things and have different outcomes. In the case of people going through many relationships, it?s just like changing partners to work with.

Some may write things according to the past experiences or have new ideas. While writing, the couples may change their pens. In a new relationship, one party might mind that his or her partner?s pen has been used by other people before.

It also requires both parties to play their part to keep the relationship forever lasting. You only live once. Ask yourself, what do you really want to do and achieve in life?

Friday, June 18, 2004

Fri, 18 Jun 2004 05:52:44 GMT

I know its my fault to forget our annivesary. But I been really busy with work. And my leg have not recover. Anyway... ... I duno am I really such a bad boyfriend? She don't seems very happy with me now a days. Maybe I just too sensitive... ... I get jealous too easily. But its because I love her. Come on... ... How many of you gals n guys out there can take it when ur partner gets a phone call or sms in the middle of the night? Furthermore you duno who the other party is. She attract lots of guys to fall for her. Yes I'm happy that I have her now. But I'm afraid that I would lose her as well. Everytime such things happen. I really duno what to do. Whatever itis, thank you very much for spending your precious time in reading my complains. I wish all of you out there best of health. -------------- Ivan

Monday, June 14, 2004

Mon, 14 Jun 2004 15:04:21 GMT

time now 0001 :)..

4mth and 1 day le.. hmm..

but did he even realised it's the 4th mth anniversary?....

bleah~

Thursday, June 03, 2004

Thu, 03 Jun 2004 05:09:18 GMT

Hi everyone ... Thank you for all the Birthday wishes especially to my Mao Mao ... and I would like to thank all of you who leave messages and keep our blog alive .

Monday, May 24, 2004

Mon, 24 May 2004 04:31:44 GMT

i miss him... miss my zhu mao darling ..arrgh!!!~..

y does he always have to go overseas all the time.. and it's always when i'm not having my holidays... hmm....

the distant really makes me treasure and appreciate him even more...

it's like.. when he's not around.. there's no one to pamper and dote on me like he does... hmm...

misSSssssSsSsSSs youUuUUUuU

xxandros aka magg

Saturday, May 15, 2004

Sat, 15 May 2004 08:57:16 GMT

Happy birthday darlingggggggg~~~~~

*muackz*

lurve you~~~~

ivan's birthday today... heh heh...~ HAPPUI BIRTHDAE!!!~~~

happy birthday to you~* HapPy biRtHdAy to You!!!~ Happy bithday to ZhU maO:+:+:+:~~~ happy birthday to YOU!!!! ~:+:magg:+: